Discovering a person with a world view matching yours.
Discovering a new author and book.
Discovering a new podcast.
Alan Roger Currie writings.
The starting point of understanding male-female relationship dynamics is to understand that all social interactions between a (heterosexual) man and a woman are going to fall into three categories:
- A strictly sexual relationship between a man and a woman (i.e., what most people refer to as ‘casual sex lovers’ or ‘f-ck buddies’)
- A relationship between a man and a woman that does not involve any sort of physical interplay and/or sexual interplay (i.e., what most people refer to as a ‘platonic friendship’ or ‘business-only relationship)
- A relationship between a man and a woman where the couple spend time together over a period of weeks, months, or years for both sexual reasons and non-sexual reasons (i.e., what most people refer to as ‘marriage,’ ‘cohabitation,’ a ‘boyfriend-girlfriend relationship,’ ‘Friends-with-Benefits’ [FWB] arrangement, or simply a long-term ‘romantic’ relationship [LTR])
Now if ALL men and ALL women were 100% honest with each other regarding which of those three types of companionship they were genuinely seeking, then there would be no such thing as what is known as ‘manipulative head games.’ The reality is, most men and most women are NOT completely honest with members of the opposite sex about what specific type of companionship they are really looking for.
Arguably nothing weakens a man’s sense of self-confidence and self-esteem and exposes the fragility and sensitivity of a man’s ego more than the fear of being abruptly rejected and subsequently indefinitely ignored by a woman whom he is very attracted to.
Here is the most obvious ‘irony’ regarding men’s fear of rejection: The more afraid a man is of rejection, the less likely he is to approach a woman of interest and initiate a conversation with her, which essentially means that this man is ‘rejecting himself’ before he ever takes any action to possibly connect with the woman of interest. This is what is simply known as a ‘lack of self-confidence and self-assurance.’
QUICK, STRAIGHTFORWARD REJECTION IS ALWAYS BETTER THAN DELAYED REJECTION IN THE LONG-RUN
As I express in my various eBooks, paperbacks, and audiobooks, if a man is going to be rejected by a woman, it is always better to be rejected by that woman in the first five-to-ten minutes of your very first conversation with her than it is to be rejected by a woman after completing three dinner dates, two lunch dates, and fifteen hours of entertaining telephone conversations. Trust me on this. The latter will leave a man feeling much more angry, frustrated, bitter, and regretful in the long-run than the abrupt rejection will.
When I think of women who rejected me beginning with the age of eighteen years old, I honestly cannot remember the names of 99% of the women who rejected me during my very first conversation with them. Even women who may have abruptly rejected me within the last twelve months or so, I honestly cannot remember what the first or last names of these women are at the moment.
Rollo Tomassi on Obsidian Radio – The Voice of The Everyday Brother.
This episode of Stating The Obvious is sponsored by:
Asshole Consulting. You want truth? It’ll cost you. But it’ll cost you less than being lied to.